Saturday, September 5, 2009

Inglourius Basterds

It took me a long time to review this movie. I couldn't figure out what to say. I love this poster because it says, "Once upon a time in Nazi occupied France...where apparently no one could spell." It's the truth. It's classic Quentin Tarantino. You will recognize the style from Kill Bill and if you didn't like Kill Bill don't go see this movie. The main draw, let's not kid ourselves, is Brad Pitt. He and his hilariously bad Southern Tennessee accent are the real stars in this movie. Quentin does an excellent job of tying together themes of outrageous inhumanity and stupidly arrogant ignorance by those that had money and weren't bullied by Hitler. Brad Pitt plays a Nazi soldier in a force of pissed off Jewish men and other men who are or have been persecuted by The Nazis. Brad Pitt tells his men that he has a little Creek Indian in him and that each man owes him 100 Nazi scalps and when he makes this request he doesn't mean it metaphorically. He means he wants his scalps and as he says, "I will have my scalps." The violence that seem to be the staple of all Quentin Tarantino movies and the graphic nature of it is missing in this movie and I have to say, thank god. There are times when there are graphic scenes of violence but nothing too cringeworthy. In Entertainment Weekly, they said it best when they said, "this is World War 2 the way Hollywood woulda done it." All I can say is amen to that. It doesn't ever tell you where the big scar on Brad's neck comes from or any of his character's back story. It's a little long and slow in parts and of course some of it is in German and therefore subtitled and to me annoying. This movie is worth seeing regardless of whether you like Quentin Tarantino or not. This movie is just good fun! I loved it, but then in my eyes Quentin Tarantino can do no wrong and he has proven it once again!

This movie gets *** out of 4 stars because it is a little too long and slow in places, but still I laughed, I cried, I cringed and I cowered on the edge of my seat. Like I said before....just plain ole fun! Go see it!

Monday, August 17, 2009

The Time Traveler's Wife

I went to this movie hoping the critics were wrong. My hopes were soon dashed. The premise of the movie and the book it is based on are good. The general idea of a man with a genetic disorder who involuntarily travels through time to the most important times in his life. What I can't understand is how or why? How, if he honestly can't control this disorder does he make sure to show up at just the right moment just a little bit older. For example, as he disappears while getting dressed for his wedding, not to worry an older looking gray-haired version of himself shows up to see his bride walk confused but happily down the aisle. If he can control it that much to make sure he is there at his wedding and then the younger version who should have been there for the wedding shows up at the reception, again, at just the right moment. Like the poster, this movie is topsy-turvy. I was so confused trying to keep up with all the time traveling and therefore the story line. The Henry that shows up to foreshadow his death for all of 10 seconds in front of his wife and his younger self was just down right annoying. He states throughout the entire movie that no matter how much he "travels," he can never change the past or the future and is sure not to spill the beans to ruin the future. So, the gist is, the whole time I was sitting there going what on Earth is happening? Wait if he can make sure he's there for his wedding then why can't he control where he goes. I want to give this the benefit of the doubt and hope that the book is more clear and less confusing than this movie. Rachel McAdams is very good in this movie, as she always is, and so is Eric Bana although his age transformations are not that convincing. When he is supposed to be in his early twenties he still looks like he's in his 30s and the only way to tell is one small gray streak in his hair. I don't know if I would say "I Do" to this movie, at least the movie on the "big" screen. Wait for the DVD and see if the deleted scenes make anything more clear. If not, read the book and hope that clears things up, but if that doesn't do it, be ready to stay confused because if you aren't when you walk out of this movie then you are much quicker than me. If this is the case please comment and explain.

This movie gets **1/2 stars love Rachel McAdams as always and Eric Bana does well at hiding his accent but not his age. Rent it don't buy a movie ticket. It was something to do on a lonely boring Saturday night otherwise I just might have skipped it.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Julie and Julia

Julia Child changed the world. In a time when women were frying chicken and cooking mashed potatoes for dinner, or for those lucky enough to have servants who cooked, Julia child took a chance on learning to cook at the Cordon Bleu cooking school in Paris where she moved with her husband Paul. Meryl Streep doesn't fail in her adaptation of Mrs. Child and her very distinctive voice and demeanor of fearlessness. She fought the odds and kept pushing and cooking until she eventually became one of the most famous cookbooks in history and pioneering the TV cooking show. Julie Powell was a disgruntled, bored cubicle worker at an insurance company who has to constantly listen to the woes of others. Her husband gives her, an aspiring writer, the idea to write a blog, where you don't have to worry about being rejected by a publishing company, she can publish for the world to read. She vowed on her blog, the Julie/Julia project to cook the 524 recipes in Julia Child's cookbook in one year and to blog about it everyday. As she does, she faces multiple breakdowns over failed cooking and a nearly fatal blow to her marriage after her husband gets sick of the world revolving around her and Julia Child. In the movie, Julia Child is alive and Julie does everything she can to show Julia that what she did mattered and in the process, improves her life, her love and relationship with her husband, and her well-being and outlook on life. In all the hardships of the cooking, the failures and her determination to finish make her stronger. Obviously, her blog becomes wildly popular and she eventually writes a book based on her experiences with that blog. There are flashbacks to Julia Child and her life as well. The whole movie could not have been about either woman, but especially not about Julia Child who is fun to watch for a while but after a while, her voice and complaining start to stop being cute and become annoying. The movie is cute, but a little slow at times and had me thinking when is this movie going to end? Well, it ends and Julie never meets Julia, but her life was changed regardless. The only thing hard to believe is that Julie and Julia don't weigh 500 pounds because the one thing about French Cuisine according to Julia Child is USE LOTS OF BUTTER! FromQ the entrees, the sides, and the desserts there isn't enough exercise in the world that could work it all off. Other than that, this movie is very cute, very watchable, slow at times, but ends well and leaves you satisfied after walking out. All together a delicious meal. Go partake in the goodness. Anything with Meryl Streep in it cannot be wrong in my see it and just hope you aren't hungry afterward cause you will crave French fattening food.

*** 1/2 stars only losing half a star because it is a litle slow in places and could be condensed a little but other than that a real treat!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

The Ugly Truth

Okay, I was reading People magazine the other day, don't get me started on how pissed I am at that rag. Anyway, they gave this movie one star. I was like oh it must really suck then, but I will have to sit through it because my Mom wants to see it. People magazine was very wrong. This movie is cute and funny and a little bit crass, hence the R-rating. Here's the formulaic story-line. Katherine Heigl is big shot TV news producer in Sacramento. Gerard Butler is crass, tells it like it is, cable syndicated jackass who talks about what's wrong with women and how men think about them. So, because this is America and everything is backwards. People watch the show that Gerry does cause we like smut, it's the American way. Well, people don't much like the news. So to increase ratings and prevent shut down from the big bosses, you know cause of the bad economy and stuff, they bring in Mr. Butler himself to help the ratings of the news show and admittedly and predictably it helps. So, there's big shot news producer girl, she's a control-freak who scares men away with her checklist of perfection that they must live up to. She can't stand him and makes a bet with him that he can get her a hot male neighbor/doctor she likes if she does what he says. If it works, she lays off, if not, he quits. Okay, so he dresses her up in slutty dresses, gets her hair extensions, you know shallow crap and it works. Gerry isn't so happy it works. I won't ruin the story for you but you can guess what happens.

On that subject, a quick note to all you "movie critics" out there. Romantic comedies are always the same. There are few exceptions. Man or woman hate each other. Man or woman gets put in weird or awkward situations, man or woman fall in love with object of hate at the beginning. Hello, this is the way a romantic comedy is supposed to work. So yes, it's predictable, but so what, doesn't mean we should say it sucks because it has a predictable plot. Very few movies these days don't have predictable plots. So, you pros out there who are being so petty about your ratings, pull the giant stick out of your butt. Movies are entertainment. We want to believe we could have an Eric Winter and a Gerard Butler in love with us. We need to believe it for just a two hour span and then we can go back to our own normal and usually boring lives where no Gerard or Eric enters the picture. The movie was entertaining. It was worth the money and it was cute. Good movie. Go see it.

**1/2 the reason for such a low rating is only because Gerard Butler is not famous for his face, he is famous for his abs and we saw none of them. Also, he looked like someone while putting makeup on him in the makeup chair before his TV appearances could have introduced him to a razor, cause he's damn cute, but you just want to go buy him some shaving cream and a razor. Katherine Heigl seems to play the exact same character in every movie. Control freak who is clueless about life and love and not willing to take risks. Sound familiar, yeah you might have seen it in a little movie called 27 dresses. Good movie for fun and entertainment, if you want the meaning of life or you want to cry or be scared go see something else, otherwise, go. Note to suck..shut up!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

The Hangover!

The Hangover

All I know is that I and my friend were not really wanting to go to this movie. I had a free movie ticket and a gift card that had around 6 dollars on it. The movie had been out quite a while and I had heard some good whispers and stuff about it, but nothing definitive. I heard whispers about a sequel and this movie making Bradley Cooper a star.

For once folks, all the rumors were true. From the very beginning this movie had me laughing so loud I think I was upsetting the people in front of me in the theater. Maybe not though, because they were laughing too. This movie is what I would call, "universally," funny. Meaning that you will laugh at this movie and you will laugh hard. You may even find yourself slapping your knee or clapping or whatever you do when you are truly laughing at something truly funny. I cannot remember the last time I laughed so hard.

This is not a movie to take your Mom to, if you do you will be embarrassed. Unless, you have one of those uber-cool Mom's who tries to dress and act like you and your friends. Otherwise, for those of us with "true" Mom's don't watch this with her. Watch it with your best friends and if you are lucky like me, you can look back on the time you went to Vegas and at times, I have to admit, be jealous of the crazy stuff these guys did or were doing. My friend who I saw the movie with and I went to Vegas together and it made me want to go back. It's Vegas, baby! This truly is a "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas," situation. The reason being that they "accidentally" got "ruffied," you know the date rape drug that wipes your memory? Everyone has to have heard of it.

Anyway, they have a soon to be groom, a married school teacher with a potty mouth, a crazy guy that at one point they call, fat Jesus, because yeah he honestly looks like Jesus, you know, but, fat. A dentist who is somehow missing a tooth, got married, and inherited a baby and a tiger. Who knew a dentist's life could be so interesting?

The tiger is in the bathroom when one of the guys who doesn't where pants often, but definitely should gets up from this night that they can't remember and decides to use the bathroom. The same bathroom in which the tiger is kept. How they got the Tiger in is a funny story and even funnier is how they get the tiger out. The baby is treated well, don't worry no babies were harmed in the making of this movie. Bradley Cooper plays the kind of guy you want to marry. He's faithful and lovable and sweet and hides all his faults and penchant for the crazy things in life from you and hides it well. That is the kind of man we all need. Men don't have bachelor parties anymore, at least not fun ones because we women worry so much about what they are going to do at them. Ninety percent of the time the bride does worse stuff at her bachelorette party than any man will do.

Ladies, if your man wants to go to a strip club for his bachelor party let him go. What's the harm? If he is going to cheat on you with some groddy skanky exotic dancer then let him do it before you say I do and save both of you the heart ache. If the man loves you, and he has any sense at all, he will not cheat on you with some gross stripper. If he does you don't want to marry him anyway. So let this movie remind all women, men are stupid they do stupid things, it's just the nature of the beast. It's still in them from the day of the cave-man with the club and that magical elixir we all call alcohol tends to bring back the grunting and cro-magnon ways. Then, they wake up in the morning and they are back to the evolved men we love and they have a great story to tell their sons when they get ready for their bachelor party, or in this case don't, cause they don't remember. Give them this one night. You have them for life, they need this one night to truly be a man.

Go see this movie or rent it. You will laugh. If you don't then you are made of stone and might want to get that checked out. Something is wrong with you if you do not laugh at this movie at all. Just heed my warning and don't see it with Mom or Grandma or especially for you women out there, your fathers. That is just not something you want to discuss after the movie or pretend you didn't see.

This is definitely destined to become a cult classic a la Old School and Bradley Cooper has become a household name. No more is he the side kick to the star, he is now the star, which he rightly deserves. So yay Bradley, yay other guys that star in this. Good movie, bet you had a blast shooting it. The fact that you could act out any second of this movie without laughing is amazing in itself. Good job fellas, maybe next time don't let anyone drug you so you will remember. And you might want to rethink the tiger. I'm just saying. Okay well that's my review, it's good go see it. I recommend it.

**** This gets a full four stars for just being a damn good time. I had a lot of fun watching the movie and so will anyone else who sees it, but it is not for the faint of heart or anyone who cannot take a little raunchiness, cause the raunch factor is high, but it's worth sitting through to get to the fun. Way to go! A Must See for sure!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

             The saying goes, no movie is ever as good as the book. In this instance, I have to agree. The movie was good and stuck close to J.K Rowling's book in many ways as far as plot. The problem with a much hyped and waited for movie is that the hype and the anticipation sometimes outweigh the movie's quality itself. That is the case here. The movie was good and the special effects were excellent. The story telling however lacked time. It was as if they tried to "fit it all in." All the actors are back and all have aged. Ron has grown up and hormones are running rampant throughout Hogwarts in Harry's sixth year. There are surprisingly many laughs in this installment and the casting and acting couldn't have been better especially from Daniel Radcliffe himself. His comic timing and varying expressions are better, it's not all brooding and whining this time. The problem is that J.K. Rowling paints pictures with her words that put an image in your head that as much as you try you never really let go of. The worry and overwhelming feeling of impending doom with the return of Voldemort is not conveyed. The secrets are attained and we learn about the Horcruxes and how many there are, which of course sets up the next two installments of the 800 page Deathly Hallows. A key character dies and when this person died in the book as I was reading the pages were bent with tears streaming from my eyes. Maybe, it was because I knew what was coming, or maybe it just wasn't as poignant as the way Rowling wrote it. I don't know which of the two it was or if it was a little of both combined, but I found myself almost having to force myself to cry because it was what felt "appropriate." It was not actually sadness that gripped me but tears that came as a result of the events and what the appropriate emotion should be, not real heartfelt sorrow. That heartfelt sorrow was abundant when reading the book and caused me to be so mad that the book and the wall met for the first time. The romance that blossoms between Harry and Ginny is not well developed, in fact in the first place he sets a date with a beautiful Muggle girl until Dumbledore shows up to remind Harry of the world he truly lives in. I'm having a problem reviewing this movie because I have so recently reread the book. Some of the scenes had me asking, wait did that happen in the book? I don't remember that. The big cave scene is pretty much how Rowling wrote it. The school grounds, setting is even more amazing than ever and you ask yourself are these sets built or are they shooting in a real place and if it is a real place where is it and when can I visit? The acting was excellent, the special effects superb, and as with all the Harry Potter movies it was entertaining and surprisingly scary at times.  This is a must see.  If you have read the book really recently you might notice some scenes they added and some they completely left out.  Where is Bill and Fleur? I'm confused?  Guess, we will find out.  If you are just watching the movies and not reading the books, then you are missing a huge part of the story, so get reading after you see the movie.

*** Three stars because it was entertaining and I'm just a Harry Potter fan, but not the best movie of the franchise, we will have to see if Deathly Hallows lives up to the excellent writing of the book.  Go see it, worth the 10 bucks and like I said before, it's Harry Potter!

Sunday, July 5, 2009

The Proposal

You can't live in the United States without seeing ads for Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynold's new movie The Proposal. This movie was very good. One highlight in particular lies in the much beloved and long missing from the spotlight, Betty White as "Grammy." Ryan Reynolds has his usual sarcastic sense of humor going on, but maybe toned down a little bit from former movies where he had all the comic relief in the movie resting on his chiseled shoulders. The actor, married about one year ago to fellow thespian Scarlett Johansson sparkles with charisma in this movie. Sandra Bullock is looking better than ever. Here her hair, clothes, shoes, everything is perfect and expensive, which becomes a funny issue as the movie progresses. The only thing wrong with this movie is that it may have been "over-exposed" by the press. The trailer gives you pretty much the entire plot-line and because it is a romantic comedy, anyone with any common sense can guess what is going to happen. Let's just put it this way, wouldn't be so funny if the main characters were prosecuted for defrauding the government with a phony marriage. Get the picture? That's what I thought.
The two actors do not have the same chemistry on screen as Bullock's movie soul-mate Keanu Reeves. Sandra usually produces good chemistry with all her co-stars, but it is hard to believe that these two would ever get together, there is no affection and you never guess that Reynold's character has any feelings toward her at all. There should have been that scene in every romantic comedy aka chick flick, where they have an amazing kiss or love scene, but then regret it and not know what it really means. There was no "light bulb" moment. I kept waiting and waiting for the light bulb and it never came. Their relationship falls a little flat and they never fully develop Sandra or Ryan's characters. Otherwise, it is just good fun and who wouldn't mind looking at Ryan Reynolds for two hours, some of that time in which he strips off all clothes. You will not see me complaining. The price of admission has gone up and so too have the expectations of movie-goers who need to be convinced they will be entertained, before they pay the price, in this declining economy. Let's just say, dig through the couch, go to the emergency coffee can full of money, scrape together the money anywhere you can and go see this one! It's cute, it's funny and above all it's entertaining. Isn't entertainment all that really matters in the end?

*** Three stars for this one it would be four, but it is very hard for any romantic comedy to get four stars on my ratings because they are all insanely predictable which is worth one whole star. So in this case three is the best it could be. Go see it! Take your girlfriend if you are a guy. Drag your boyfriend to see it if you are a girl. Trust me if you watch him closely you will see him secretly enjoying this movie. All you have to say is Sandra Bullock naked...he will go. TRUST

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Public Enemies

I have read the reviews written by the fans and other people on Fandango and I wanted to go see this movie and love it and prove them all wrong.  Well, all the criticism was not wrong this time. the cinematography left something to be desired.  I felt like my eyesight got so much worse while straining to watch this movie.  I don't know if it was intentional because it was supposed to be set in the 30s during the heyday of the Great Depression and the infamous G-men started by J. Edgar Hoover.  
They called John Dillinger the gentleman bank robber because he never took money from hard working people only from the greedy banks.  He brags in the movie that he can rob a bank in a minute forty flat.  There may be truth to that.  It was a time when the criminals were more of a "rockstar" than the G-men that had bad reputations. John Dilinger was handsome, a gentleman and a bad boy all rolled into one.  What's not to love?  Well, I love Johnny Depp, in my opinion the man can do no wrong.  In this movie, he is the one bright spot, when he's minus the horrible 30s mustache.  
The picture was often too dark to tell who was doing what.  The way he meets his girlfriend is a little bit odd, but cute at the same time and their love story is heart-warming.  A lot of the scenes are anti-climactic, if really bullet-ridden.  The ending was too much of a disappointment considering that the whole movie the G-men spent their lives trying to find John Dillinger.  For federally trained cops these movie G-men sure don't notice much.  Two scenes see Johnny walking right next to a pack of determined G-men and they don't even bat an eye in his direction.  
The whole movie the chorus from the new Eminem song, "We Made You." Kept going through my head.  You're a rock star, everybody wants you, player who can really blame them, we're the ones who made you."  Johnny Depp's Dillinger is most of the time a "rockstar." 
Johnny Depp still has not done wrong, but this movie was not the best venue for his incredible acting chops.  I have to agree with one Fandango fan who said to not waste your money and wait for the DVD and as much as I wanted to be able to tell you differently, I can't.  The lighting in the movie was horrible, the bank robberies were formulaic and the shooting was a little too excessive at times.  I often asked myself, geez what kind of bullets are these guys using that they can shoot through dry-wall?  
Christian Bale gives kind of a "blah" performance.  It's flat and utterly emotionless, it wasn't a stretch for him to play this part, his Madame Tussaud's wax figure could have played it and we wouldn't have known differently.  It would have been nice for them to fill out the character's depths a little more and maybe put more history of John Dillinger and how he affected the country and what the people actually thought of him.  You get a small glimpse of his notoriety, but nothing very explicit about the G-men and why he became Public Enemy number 1.  Johnny Depp gets all the stars. He carried this burden completely on his shoulders, no one else's character was even close to memorable.  Johnny Depp still has his looks and you wouldn't know he was in his forties.  He made a good fit for the very shallow character.  Just be prepared to squint and strain your eyes to try to see what is going on and possibly develop a headache due to all the straining. Not my favorite movie ever, but worth the Matinee price.

This gets only ** two stars.  It was too hard to see the actual action and the lighting totally needed help.  Johnny Depp was great as Dillinger but I walked out with as much knowledge of Dillinger as I had when I went in, which was almost none.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Transformers 2 Revenge of the Fallen

  I've been out of the country for a couple of weeks.  Came home and found out that movies are now ten dollars so you better make it worth it. So was Transformers worth my not hard earned ten dollars?  Yes.  Why, you may ask? Well, because it is fun,  I was completely entertained and stressed out about the fate of the world if Megatron and his mentor, "The Fallen" took away the sun.  That would not be good.  So anyway, was Transformers good.  Well, yes and no.  First of all, Megan Fox as much as I want to put her on my one way rocket to the moon for her anti-rpattz quotes and her too tight ponytail, and the stick up her much admired behind, I have to give her props.  She actually made me forget how much I hate her in this movie.  She made me believe she was Michaela a much more likable person.  Shia Labeouf,  when did he grow up and get hot?  What rock was I living under?  With a well placed tan and hair that even after being blown up stays in place, he is a kid no more.  Forget the Disney channel and his many child-star antics.  He is Disney material no more.  The way they explained his broken hand was really stupid and sometimes the robots during the fight scenes tended to blend together where you couldn't tell who was actually kicking who's butt.  Were the good guys winning or not?  It was hard to tell sometimes.  The plot was very thin and far-fetched, but it's a movie about robots who transform from various types of machines into intelligent walking and talking robot-people.  I love the whole, my planet was destroyed so we will save yours idea, can anyone say Superman and Krypton?  Well whatever, the movie was really long and definitely left room for them to round out the collection with a Transformers 3 Megatron's return maybe? I don't know but let's just put it this way.  The work of Shia is never done, broken hand or not, he still saves the world and does it looking good.  Megan Fox you are not my favorite, but at least you have a little appeal in this movie for me.  Maybe you won't get a ticket on my rocket just yet, I'll wait and see if you can make it up to the Twilight fans of the world what you said about their Twi-god.  Let's see if you have the acting chops to live up to the comparison that you should be extremely flattered you are getting to Angelina Jolie.  Shia keep up the good work, whatever that may be that is making you a huge box office draw.  We love you and will continue to, age is definitely agreeing with you and you are a good actor no matter how stupid the part.

** 1/2 stars.  This movie is kinda stupid in it's original make-up.  You don't really have a leg to stand on plot-wise though when your movie is based on a toy by Hasbro.  Look out GI Joe you have large robot shoes to fill.  The movie is way too long and a little corny at times and not to mention predictable! Otherwise, it's good fun, worth the 2 and a half hour run time, I think. Wait for the DVD my lovelies, it will be much better when you can pause and ask your neighbor, "Wait, what just happened?"  Cause I couldn't and I needed to ask kellebelle just that question... I still don't know what was going on in some parts.  Wait for the DVD...out soon I'm sure!

Saturday, June 13, 2009

My Life in Ruins

Nia Vardalos of My Big Fat Greek Wedding fame, stars next to a really hunky and at first really hairy,bus driver as she leads a tour in her native home of Greece to see all the most important parts of the country.  You know it's the whole deal with the bus and the crazy tourists, the most obnoxious being, the Americans.  I love that the title is very bad pun.  Not only does Nia's character Georgia live her life in the ruins of ancient Greece and her "life", both social and emotional, is in ruins as well.  It takes a bus load of crazies and a hot bus driver to help her realize that she needs to loosen up.  This of course was produced by the dynamic duo of Greek centered films, Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, who has a very small cameo.  Richard Dreyfuss plays and old washed up corny joke telling old man.  He definitely makes you love him.  The only thing I have to say is the bus must have pulled up to the old folks home because I was literally the youngest person in the theatre. It seems this movie appeals to the dwindling baby boomer generation, in other words, the old people.  All the little old ladies think it was the funniest and cutest movie they have seen in a long time. They actually said that word for word after it was over.  I, of course, went with my mother, who may fit the demographic but not the mind-set. We wanted to see the proposal and she isn't much for the Hangover type humor and we didn't think we could stomach The Taking of Pelham 123, so wee picked this.  It served the purpose, wasted our time. This movie was very fun, I will say that, but it was too long in getting around to the point and there were moments of intense cheesiness.  Also, as someone who is going to travel to a foreign country would like to say that Americans are not as obnoxious as they make us out to be in the movie.  It's a happy movie, with a happy ending. Duh!

*1/2 stars One and a half stars because there are some laughs to be had while watching this movie but everything is ultimately stereotypical and jaded ideas of what tourists are or at least how they are seen.  I think this is the first movie I have like Richard Dreyfuss in since Mr. Holland's Opus.  Don't waste your money, wait for the DVD, this movie fits well into the ruins of Greece.  It's the ruins of a movie. If you are eighty you might enjoy it otherwise wait for Blockbuster.  This is my opinion, oughta be yours.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Taken on DVD

Well folks...what can I say Taken was very good.  I liked it but it was predictable. I mean in the beginning of the movie Liam Neeson tells us step by step what is going to happen.  In classic, super dude style, Liam, knows how to don that black leather coat.  It was entertaining, it was captivating enough to turn my attention from my latest addiction, blogging and twitter.  Liam Neason plays an over protective Dad who has given up his career as apparently a bad ass. It's not really clear.  He gave up his career to be near his daughter and she is all he lives for now.  When, her mother and step father agree to let their 17 year old daughter go to Europe for a month with a friend and stay at her aunt and uncle's house in France.  When they arrive and walk out of the airport they are greeted by what seems to be a charming young guy who will show them around the city.  Well, let's just say he's the bait and they are the biting fish.  He shares a cab with them in the guise of saying he will come pick them up for a party later that night, and coincidence, or not, would have it that about twenty minutes later and several phone calls from Liam Neason comes kidnappers who in classic movie style kidnap the girls for sex slavery after addicting them to drugs.  Well, they messed with the wrong Dad this time.  He says it in the previews, so I'm not revealing anything, but he says, "Let my daughter go now and that will be the end of it.  I don't have money, but if you don't let her go I have a very special set of skills.  I will find you and I will kill you." Then the guy on the other line says "Good Luck."
Way to go genius! When a man shows no emotion and is that confident that he will hunt you down and kill you, um, take my advice, believe him!  You can guess what happens next.

** 1/2 Two and half stars, one for being predictable, second for the whole ex-wife shared custody story, and third for the sex slavery story, hello it's been done come up with something creative now k?  Definitely worth renting but I am glad I didn't go see it at the theatre!

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

Ben Stiller gives Disney a hit once again, with the family friendly and adult friendly Night at the Museum.  I went and I was the youngest person in there.  Amy Adams plays Amelia Earhardt, the treasured and brave ally and unlikely love interest of Ben's character Larry Delpy.  Larry at the beginning has moved on from his duties at the museum although he goes back regularly to see his friends as they are animated when the sun goes down.  Larry soon comes to find out that most of his friends are being packed up and shipped to storage in the Smithsonian archives in DC.  The famous tablet from the last movie will not be going with them and they will probably be wax once again, but this time forever.  Larry realizes that he is not happy and decides that he is going to go rescue his friends in DC from an evil pharoah that has come to life and wants to stay that way permanently, while turning his army on the world and making himself god-king of the world.  Well as we all know Larry can't let this happen when he gets a call from little bitty Jedidiah (played by Owen Wilson) he comes to the rescue...sort of.  The ensuing antics are funny.  The Einstein bobbleheads as shown in the previews are funny, and the special effects are amazing, but come on what else did you expect this is Disney after all, they can do some amazing things at that place.  If you need to go see a movie with the family and don't want to be hiding your head or sinking low in your seat during awkward sex scenes with your Dad, Mom or Grandparent, or covering any innocent eyes of children then this is the movie to see.  It's fun without being raunchy and it brings a lot of history lessons with it.  I don't know if you are low on cash if you should go see it in theatres but when it does come out on DVD at least go rent it. It's pure clean fun for anyone.

*** 1/2 stars Amy Adams is great as Amelia Earhardt and Ben Stiller is great as the unlikely hero once again.  As honest Abe says in the movie, I cannot tell a lie, well I'm not lying when I say this movie was very entertaining and worth the time.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Random Hearts

Okay everyone, I was thinking about this movie the other day that I saw once upon a time with Harrison Ford called Random I thought I would review it. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....snore....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...snore...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....snore...When does the movie start? oh it's over? I fell asleep? I was snoring? Oh! Okay! Well let's go k?
Random Hearts sucks, I srsly was like this movie is so boring. I have insomnia and I think this just may be the sorry it's horrible but true. Ambien ain't got nothing on Random Hearts

in the negative stars...never I repeat, never see (sleep through) this will be a waste of you life...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Friday, May 22, 2009


"Operation Valkerie is still in effect." Operation Valkerie was the last attempt of 20 total made on the life of Adolf Hitler. Tom Cruise plays the main organizer of the operation Colonel Van Staufenburg. After losing his eye one hand and 3 fingers on his other hand he went on to as closely as possible overthrow the worst war criminal to ever live. He was willing to die to prove that all Germans were not evil, that they did not all hate the Jews and they did not all believe the same things that Hitler did. Adolf Hitler lived that day and later that night took back Berlin after what Stauffenburg had done to try to overtake the capital. This movie is good if you care about history. I liked it because when we think back on WW2 everyone thinks it was Germany that was evil. It was not Germany at all. It was one man who assumed control of Germany. The movie shows that there were men of conscience who put their lives on the line to stop the terror. It seems convenient that all the German soldiers and characters in the movie spoke perfect American English and had no German accents whatsoever. It was okay. I'm glad I didn't waste my money and go see it at the theatre but it's worth the cost of Blockbuster or Netflix.

2 ** stars for educating us on the difference between the evil of an entire people and one man who rules them. The story needed to be told, could have been better, but hey they can't all be four star right!

Let Me Take a Moment to Say YESSSS!!!!

Move over old British stuffy guys here comes Robert Downey Jr. minus the drug addiction. He is seriously hot if you have to go to jail for a while to come out looking that good let's all send our husbands, boyfriends, guy friends, to jail just for a while so they can work out in the yard. Let's just make it one of those jails that you get buff in. It seems to be the "in" thing. Like hello, Kiefer Sutherland obviously bored about not shooting any more of his 24 hours headbutted a guy for Brooke
Anyway, back to the situation at hand, we have a hot, muscular Sherlock Holmes, and a just as hot, don't know about the muscular, Jude Law as Watson, it's elementary my dear bloggers this movie is going to be AWESOME! To quote my friend lauren's bite. Kthanxbye

Thursday, May 21, 2009


It's a sequel, that's a prequel, set in the future to events in the past. The reviews are in and they aren't looking good for T4 or should we say T1/2. This is technically a prequel but it's a continuation of events in the other three Terminator movies that we have seen in the past. Don't try to understand you just can't it's too freaking confusing. This movie is and does what it is supposed to do and that is ENTERTAIN. Movies are entertainment when all these critics turn up their nose at a movie because of it's depth or quality acting then the action movie genre is not where they should look. No one who sees this movie should or if they have any sense, would, go into this movie saying, my life is going to change dramatically thanks to this next two hours. It is not going to make you money or give you the meaning of life it's going to do what movies especially action movies are supposed to do, entertain you, get you out of your life for a couple of hours (helped by the strictness of cell phone enforcement) and let you jump into someone else's world a world where the hero always wins and the good guys either die a heroic death or they don't die at all. I think if you want to see a movie that makes you pay attention the whole time, keeps your interest, and stays true to its roots...then this is it. If you want to be told the meaning of life go see the Dahli Lama. It's an action movie people get with the program! This is John Connor and we have won this battle but the war is not over! Oh and let's not forget, we now have new Man meat in the smokin hot Marcus or Sam Worthington, move over Christian Bale, maybe you should stick to playing the Dark Night cause Marcus is more bad ass than you, at least in the movie.


Saturday, May 16, 2009

Angels and Demons

Dear Lord, this movie was boring to the extreme. For a movie called Angels and Demons there were no angels and no demons. Why not name it running around Rome following statues. That, my friends, is exactly what this movie is. It has a villain that you might not expect, but anyone who enjoys a good mystery knows that it is always the person you least expect that does the crime. The most exciting part of this movie was the previews. Dude, Ron Howard usually impresses me with his vision, but I don't know if it was the book, I have not read it, or if it was the directing, or the subject matter, but this movie just bored the crap out of me. Ewan McGregor has a big part to play in the whole story and is really in the movie even more than Tom Hanks. Ewan and Tom are both looking good these days. Tom Hanks is fitter than he has been in a while as evidenced by a swim in a pool with a speedo (shutters in disgust). But personally he is too old for me thanks. Ewan McGregor has no way to be sexy in this movie because he is a priest and being Catholic, that is just wrong. So let's recap. Plot sucked. No angels or demons. No sexy men or at least ones that you can imagine on top of you without burning in hell. Cast sucked. Directing sucked. Scenery was okay, but it was scenery of the frickin Vatican who hasn't seen that? I'm starting to fall asleep as I write this. Let's put it this way, don't waste your money!

0 stars, movies rarely bore me but this one was just horrible. Having to sit through it a second time would be a form of torture I think. I'd rather just go to mass.


Sunday, May 10, 2009

Star Trek

I'm not a Star Trek fan or a fan of Captain Kirk, but after seeing this movie. I now am. I loved it! This movie is so good. It has the right amount of wierdness, foolishness, intrigue, action, and our beloved Trekkie characters both old and new...hint hint! Chris Pine pulls off the ladies man with a heart of gold like he was born to play the role. Zachary Quinto is uncanny look alike of Spock. In this movie, those mean Romulans creep up to take from the Federation Planets what in the future has been take from them by accident of Ambassador Spock. A black hole is formed and takes the future Romulans back in time to when the Enterprise made its maiden voyage and when Captain Kirk had only been in the Starfleet Academy for three years. Spock is torn between his half Vulcan, half human heritage and despite the charms and good looks of Jim Kirk, this time Spock gets the girl. It is exciting, fun, and a new way to introduce a new generation to a show that once captivated our elders. Way to go JJ Abrams. You have yourself a hit. I would not only go see it if I were you. I would go see it again, if money permitted. GO SEE THIS MOVIE! Did I mention that Chris Pine is extremely easy on the eyes and that Winona Ryder has a cameo. Will the Enterprise survive its maiden voyage? Go watch and find out.
**** 4 stars for keeping the audience interested, good casting, good directing, and superb acting. I don't know about you but I hope there are many sequals in our future..Star Date 2009.511

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

Everyone knows what this movie is about.  It's about a guy who is a huge womanizer and lethario who "dates" every woman he meets and then the minute he feels like they are getting attached he leaves.  As is his nature or was up until recently, Matthew McConaughey, plays this part with expert precision.  The kind of acting that could only be possible if the actor cold draw from life experiences.  Well, Matthew, as much as I love you, and trust me I do, you were a classic womanizer.  Now that you have a child to set an example for, many times this does tame most men I mean can anyone say Colin Farrell?  Jennifer Garner is in top form and looks great.  Love Breckin Meyer as the brother and the ghosts of past, present, and future.  Will he get the woman he has loved since he was a child or will he continue to go through women faster than paper in a shredder?  Well you will have to watch and see.  The movie is cute.  If you have a friend that is acting like a butthead to women take him to this movie and maybe he will change his womanizing ways.  It is a good date move of course.  Your classic chick flick, but still fun enough for a guy to enjoy.  Worth the time.  I might wait for the DVD instead of paying full price.

** two stars for predictability.  Matthew is losing his cute southern boyishness as happens with all men as they age, so maybe playing the guy who won't settle down is not the part for him anymore.  Maybe he should do a movie where his character has more depth.  Not a complete waste of time.

Friday, May 1, 2009

X-men Origins: Wolverine

The big reveal finally came and along with it a million gallons of water falling from the sky (it was rainy). After all this conjecture and stupid rumors and over-reactions about X-men being leaked on the internet before, today, its release date, there was a full house like expected. Hugh Jackman was wolverine, yet again, he played Logan to where you almost...almost forget it is even a movie. It draws you in, but, the connections between this movie and the first X-men from a few years ago are confusing. There are mutants we have never seen and younger versions of mutants that have met their doom. Ryan Reynolds has a cool power, but gets a very bad and disturbing makeover later in the movie. I liked the original Ryan Reynolds with his funny banter best and always have. Did I mention I love Ryan Reynolds? The movie was good if you are a fan of Wolverine and the comic books of X-men. It definitely sets the stage and I will give Hugh Jackman this; I bet if you put his image from the first movie next to his image from this one he would look either the same or better. Hugh knows how to stop the aging, but he doesn't look a bit worse for wear for two movies under his belt in this third installment, or is it the fourth, I can't remember. Anyway, it's good, it's worth seeing and it's worth the money for admission.

**1/2 stars. It suffers a little for predictability, but makes up for it in piquing our curiosity. Worth seeing at least once.


Thursday, April 30, 2009

17 Again

Went with my friend T to see 17 again which I have been looking forward to for weeks! I love me some Matthew Perry, from FRIENDS of course, but I even remember him being in She's Out of Control with Tony Danza way back in the day.   Not that I'm that old it was just on recently.  Anyway, back to the subject.  17 again was very good, surprisingly so.  It was predictable but not so much that it was annoying and I loved how it could be funny without being over crass.  The whole rich nerd subplot was amazing.  I love how Zac Ephron picked up a lot of Matthew Perry's mannerisms and habits and even a little bit of how he moves.  I wish he had been in it longer but I already feel like a cougar at 28 because I was seriously crushing on Zac's character.  Go See This Movie...I command you!

****  4 stars you have to see it now!!!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

MADE FOR TV: Nora Roberts' Tribute

This made for TV movie follows the formula of every Nora Roberts book.  Woman or Man moves to town, meets their soulmate within ten minutes of entering said town, someone tries to kill man or woman, man or woman falls in love, starts intimate relationship with main character, love interest saves them, they live happily ever after in whatever town.  Tribute with Britney Murphy was not any different.  Brit moves in to her grandmother's old house, who just happened to be one of the most famous actresses in Hollywood, and now her granddaughter is as well, then she meets Jason Lewis and in pure Nora style falls in love solves crime or mystery of who is trying to kill said character, happy ending.   stupid stupid stupid

*  one star for crappy picture quality, sparking rumors of Leeanne Rimes' and Eddie Cibrian's adulterous romance, and just bekng annoying.


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Love Takes Wing (Made for TV, Hallmark)

Slowly, but surely I have been watching the continuing saga started with Dale Midkiff and Katherine Heigl in Love Comes Softly based on the book by Jannette Oake.  Although the actors change on a regular basis and only one or two of the characters carry over for more than two and sometimes on rare occasions, 3 or 4 installments.  
In this installment, Belinda Carlisle Simpson, the adopted daughter of Missy Tyler (who has had plenty of last names, but I cannot remember them all.  She has gone to medical school and comes to a small town, stricken with a mysterious illness that no one has yet to figure out.  Dr. Simpson is not accepted too well by the townspeople at first when she fails to cure or find the source of the illness.  Eventually, she discovers a cure, finds a new man to marry despite still grief stricken by the tragic death of her husband from Tuberculosis very recently before coming to this small town.  
The townspeople blame the orphans and the dilapidated orphanage for the illness and cast them as outcasts who are not allowed in town because the townspeople believe they are contagious.  Lou Diamond Phillips plays a villain that tries to destroy what he sees as the problem the vermin of the orphanage.  Eventually as all movies in this style start there are times when you cry but a good ending.  Haylie Duff stars as Belinda's best friend who helps her come up with a new and effective way to administer fluids to patients...can anyone say IV?  

I give it 3 stars.***  I'm being more liberal about it because it is a predictable series but Jordan Bridges, son of the famous Beau, gives good eye candy, but it's pure entertainment and a look into the past before antibiotics and emergency rooms...and it keeps its Christian appeal.


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

7 Pounds

I have never cried so hard or tried so hard to figure out a movie in my life. I rented it happily ignorant of the actual plot, dude, all I can say is I am never going in the ocean ever again and I will be more careful on my cell phone in the car after seeing this movie.

I won't give away the plot because trying to figure out the big secret is the whole reason it is interesting. It's one of those films you see once and then when you see it again everything falls into place and it makes more sense. I call it the "Sixth Sense Syndrome."

This movie is worth seeing but let me tell you bring tissues because if you don't cry at this movie then you are a robot and need to report back to Oz to get a heart, you tin man. Again, great acting from Will Smith, although I miss funny and biting Will Smith such as in Men in Black and Independence Day (ID one of my favorites) this one is a must rent! I just say rent because although it would be nice to go back and watch it again now knowing the plot and all the big "secrets" I just couldn't watch it again without entering a deep state of depression. Come on Will Smith give us some movies that you can make up a rap to and sell all those records before your son gets more popular than you! SNAP! So again, MUST RENT! but only rent.

*** Three stars because I hate movies where you can't even see the screen because you are crying so hard, for you ladies make sure to wear waterproof mascara and for you men, this will not put her in a romantic mood, more than anything she will just be depressed and develop a sudden "headache."

RENT IT NOW at your local movie getting place! bye

Fast and Furious

Okay Vin Diesel fans, get ready for some eye candy. Not as much eye candy as the first Fast and Furious movie but hey it's something. Paul Walker still as good looking as ever but starting to show his age. The plot is not existent, except for the Letty (Michelle Rodriguez's part) story. I won't say what that story is but lets just say do not piss off Vin Diesel or in this case Dom!

I give it **1/2 stars simply for eye candy and Vin Diesel, and my affinity for awesome cars and my to quote Top Gun "I have a need a need for speed!" All of you who love action, fast cars, and Vin Diesel or Paul Walker then pay the money all of you who are on the fence wait for the DVD! I loved it because I love action packed movies but it was purely just entertainment but it won't give you a life changing moment that some of the greats will give you! Fun but Forgettable

New Moon

Sorry guys this movie is so random deeply on my radar that I had to include a picture of Edward and this New Moon poster that some fan who is a genius created!!! The Twilight addicts thank you!

Monday, March 30, 2009

I Love You, Man

In theatres now is a movie also starring (Paul Rudd) as Peter, who proposes to his girlfriend, a very engaging and lovely daughter of Quincy Jones. The language is suggestive and look out for the fiance's best friend and her husband and their disfunctional marriage to get you tons of laughs.
At times, the dorkiness of both Jason Segal and Paul Rudd, can make you cringe and make it hard to watch but eventually the characters become a little bit less dorky and evolve into just plain funny.
Peter is a real estate agent who is trying to sell the house of a huge client, literally and figuratively, Lou Ferigno of TV's Incredible Hulk. He struggles at first but with a little from his new best friend calls come in in droves. As is move normality, they fight and then they make up to live in a perfect bromance, happily ever after, I didn't ruin the movie there are tons of funny moments in it and Jason Segal steals the movie. But a quick WARNING if you do not like the 80s band RUSH do not see this movie because the whole movie is centered around their music a lot, so if you hate the band don't see it other wise see it. It's worth the money.

*** can tend to get a little slow at times and the music not so good


Role Models

The other day at a very frequent trip to Blockbuster, as is a place I spend a lot of my money, I found a returned copy of Role Models on Blu-ray. This movie is definitely not for anyone who does not like cussing and bad or sexually suggestive language. There is even a little kid in the movie that cusses quite often, much to my surprise.
The general story is about two men (Paul Rudd) and (Sean William Scott) who are assigned by the court to 450 hours of community service and sent to an organization resembling Big Brothers/Big Sisters. As should have been expected, Paul Rudd gets a huge renaissance role playing nerd who takes his hobby seriously. Sean William Scott gets an approximately 9 year old African American child with a potty mouth even worse than all the adults in the movie.
This movie if you can get over the language and sexually suggestive talk, you will roll on the ground laughing, especially at the end, when predictably these men turn out to be real role models for their charges. I recommend seeing this movie on DVD now, which offers a theatrical and unrated version. If you are looking for a good laugh this is the one to rent.

**1/2 counted off for predictability


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Twilight on DVD

Twilight, the insane pop culture phenomenon that made all girls fall in love with Edward and his family the Cullens. This movie is good but if you have read the books, and know the characters really well, then you will love Edward and all the Cullens, but Kristen Stewart's Bella, other than her appearance, does not live up to the Bella we all came to know and love in the books. They downplay her clumsiness a little. In the book, Bella cannot walk two steps without falling. In Twilight except for about 3 instances she seems to stay pretty well on her feet. The scenery is gorgeous and you see something new every time you watch it.


*** 3 stars for interesting story lines and for except in very few instances following the most important points in the book. Can't wait for the sequel New Moon, due out in November.



The movie Duplicity starring Julia Roberts (love her) and Clive Owen (love him). This movie pits these two beautiful people together once again and in a much more enjoyable way than in their last pairing in Closer. Closer was the most horrible waste of time ever.

Duplicity is about two spies from two different international spies one from the British version of the CIA called MI-6. Many might recognize this agency as the one that gave James Bond his license to kill. The next agency is the not so covert CIA which is the agency Julia Roberts' character Claire depicts. They meet one clandestine afternoon in Dubai at a party at the American Consulate. The movie is out of order but still easy to follow. I am not going to ruin the movie for anyone, but lets just say the movie lives up to its name by ultimately duping the two agents who think they are playing everyone else.

I give it *** 3 stars for interesting story and for keeping me guessing. Too often, I can predict the ending of a movie before it even gets five minutes into the film, but this one was a pleasant and not so surprising ending. Roberts and Owen still have chemistry and Roberts is back to the old actress that we all know and love. This one is worth the money so all of you who are waiting for movies to see that are worth the 10 bucks it costs to see it, this one is worth the money.